Dear Coach’s Kid…

dear coachs kid remember this when you move

Dear Coach’s Kid,

It’s time for another move, and well, it sucks. I get it. You were just starting to feel comfortable and this one, it stings. Before you get too deep into the moving routine I wanted to take a minute to tell you two things. First, I see you.

I see how sad you are to leave yet another home, another school, and another set of friends.

I see how sad you are to have to spend another semester answering ALL the questions that are NO ONE’s business.

I see how hard you are trying to keep it together for your mom even on the days when sadness gets the best of you, I know how many days you won the battle and you should remember too.

I see you packing up your belongings, trying to decide if you should keep the clothing from the team your family is no longer a part of, feeling torn between your loyalty to your Dad and your friends.

Here’s the Thing

I know it doesn’t feel fair to have to move again. You didn’t sign up for this. You didn’t choose to coach. And the reality is, even if you don’t love your current home familiarity is always better than the unknown isn’t it?

Are You Sure it’s Better to Stay?

Is it really better to stay than move? Are you sure? The longer I’m in this business and the more moves we add to our resume, the move I am convinced that while you, Coach’s Kid did not sign up for this crazy life, God knew exactly what he was doing when he added you to your family. He knew you before you were knit in your mother’s womb and he knew you would be packing boxes for another move.

Every move we’ve made has significantly benefited our kids and I believe you have the same opportunity if you keep your eyes open. God is not just moving your Dad on to coach. He is moving your family and he has unique opportunities available for each of you waiting because he knows you come as a package deal.

You May Already Know…

You may already know that it usually takes a year to feel settled in a new town. You will feel like the outsider in your new community for awhile. It’s likely people will know who you are before you know them, especially teachers. It’s okay to feel frustrated about this. You know that you are going to walk a hard path AGAIN.

But remember, there are also benefits to moving. You now have another opportunity at a fresh start. Be your authentic self and I guarantee you will connect with people you want to be good friends with quicker than if you try to please the masses.

As you go through your days don’t hide how smart you are and certainly don’t minimize your talents. You were created by an insanely talented Creator who designed you with a unique purpose in mind. But, a word of caution, stay humble. There will always be those that are threatened by the new kid in town. While no one is expecting you to cater to this childish behavior, it is also great to avoid adding any fuel to the fire.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. I know you know this, but I’m reminding you anyway, because sometimes when we are sad we need reminders that it’s okay to ask for help.

This too will pass. You will get through this. You will feel settled, you will find your way around another school. You will find friends. You will feel at home again, and you will be stronger for this move.

I told you I had two things to tell you. The second thing I wanted to tell you is that you amaze me. You Coach’s Kid, you are the strongest kid I know. You are resilient, compassionate, smart, talented, and so stinkin’ sharp.

You have seen so many different people groups that you have a greater understanding of how people operate than pretty much anyone else your age. You know how to work a crowd and you are quick to identify the kid who needs a friend.

All these moves, well they are already paying off, and I know that doesn’t make it any easier. I do, because every time I think about moving my kids again I start to cry. Us parents, we get it. We know we are asking you to do something that is hard. It is hard for us too.

So, here you go again, sort, purge, pack, and goodbyes. It is not easy. But know that you are seen, loved and heard. I believe in you and I know your parents do too. You’ve got this dear one.


A Coach’s Wife who’s been there and wishes someone had

reminded her kids of these things when she was so overwhelmed she couldn’t

Make your next move the smoothest one yet with my two books designed specifically for people who move frequently. (Print and Kindle Versions available)

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