This weekend I began my yearly post Christmas purge of our home. Having the extra motivation thanks to Marie Kondo on Netflix and an amazing find at our local Dollar Tree I was ready to tackle organizing our closet for the first time in our almost two years of living here.
I’d also spent a good amount of time helping our boys purge their areas due in part to our oldest son getting a new bed and needing to rearrange his room coupled with the fact that our sons are growing at a rapid pace and it’s challenging to keep them in clothes that fit these days.
I moved on to our bathroom and finally suggested to Ordell he
“Are you pregnant? Or are we moving? I’m just trying to make sense of what is happening right now.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle, but the truth is, my motivations were not coming from pregnancy or the anticipation of a move. I was doing what I always do in January and February. But for the first time in our 17 plus years of marriage he was around to observe my routine.
This isn’t the first thing Ordell has learned about me in the past year. He’s learned my routines are different than he assumed and even the TV shows I watch are more varied.
We’ve had to figure out a new normal for our family too. What does it look like to have Dad home by 6 every night? What does it look like to have weekends free from obligations other than those we choose 8 months of the year?
We’ve had to learn to let each other a little further into our spaces. And the willingness to do so has been the best investment for our marriage so far.
One of the things we accepted coaching college football was that we would need to learn to prioritize quality of time over quantity of time. With very few days to sleep in, bum around the house, and have long, spontaneous conversations we found a rhythm that worked but left little space for opportunities to learn about each other’s preferences through observation.
As we embrace our new normal I’m learning that the best investment I can make is to embrace the mundane days.
Here’s How I’m Embracing the Mundane:
- I’m learning to take opportunities like errands to chat and explore our community.
- I’m inviting Ordell to join me in my routines such as meal prep, and long summer walks.
- I’m learning to do what I do today instead of trying to avoid interrupting other’s routines.
- I’m taking the time to turn the alarm clock off and embrace the empty days on the calendar and enjoy the ability to be spontaneous.
The best investment we can make in our current season of life is to seize the time we have to learn more about each other instead of trying to keep things the way they have always been.
Seventeen years of marriage may seem like a strange time to learn about the mundane parts of each other’s lives, but right now I’m thankful for our new normal. Our foundation is stronger for this investment and in the long run, that’s worth disrupting routines isn’t it?